Monday, July 26, 2010

Toll paid for Youth

Along the lonely Alie as I walk in the new land, lonely that ever, not even a shadow to keep the company, terrible times I felt that was, thoughts deep diving and getting in a retro perspective. Thinking, recollecting and momentarily reliving the happier times of the good company and circle, umm friends i had.
I was also thinking of my happier days, where sometimes I for sure even to this day I know and regret things which i should have not done. I killed myself the best of friendships that life ever could have offered to me in my opinion. The true friendship I shared always made me fuller and content and made me feel that I had nothing else to live for as those moments I shared were so involving happy that I never felt a need of more. I experienced immense sense of engagement and self-existence. What I mean I could continue be so so transparent and open and hide no thing for I always used to be never ashamed of myself or my short comings before such a good friend. May be I always had that sense of security and trust that didn't forfeit and hold back my feelings. The person I am today is less of that open person that I am then. Am a lesser free being now than then when I still had a zillion societal added to the restrictions on easy of life my parents matricidal established.
After all those happy days had to come to an end, I wasn't actually looking or analysing what to do to undo things of past, but its got to do more with sense of realisation of sins of youth which may be God in his own philosophical way is punishing me in literally letting me loose my friendship at the summit in the most bizarre was possible through the inexperience of youth. Today as I write this blog I surely hope no one should ever get to feel such a thing feeling such a big void within at sometime of once own decisions and so called deeds.
Yes lust, inexperience and hormones make the youth is a whole different way which might lead to bigger undo able losses in life.

United stated of America

Yes finally the magical word rather the commonest common noun has come alive in my life.
The place of dreams the place of destination for many, which strangely enough for majority I had made a mundane image of "American Destination hater" and "Desi Supporter has fallen apart.

Today I return to blogging after long long really massively long time. One primary thing for such a prolonged absenteeism from this arena is purely due changed tastes and new found addiction to the online game I mentioned in the previous posts, Travian. May be too addictive and too involving than primal instincts.

Anyways the news I have relocated to the New Land of America. I moved in the last week of June, and its almost a month of stay of what seemingly looks like a long term assignment and hopefully leading to longer than expected stay here. I now join my brother who is now here for now more than 5 years.
I have a whole new set of challenges and a whole new world in front of me to experience and move on with. A completely new perspective and way of life thrown across to live, I would like to add and share the new experiences, and hopefully capture the new environment with you all.
I hope my Travian addiction wanes out sooner as this should help me further in harnessing my blogging skills.

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