Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Chocolate Bytes


Tom Hanks puts it best in his 1994 Oscar winning movie Forest Gump "Life is like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're going to get".

Interesting piece of comparison he makes on this front. Life's such a twist and turn of events that every now and then one gets caught up in surprises if not woows or ooouchs. Pleasant or unpleasant, enjoyable or painful..thats life.

Today has been an interesting day, for I had the maximum number of chocolates at a single time compared to any year combined in my life. I had half a dozen Ferrero Rocher, the spherical hazelnut covered in chocolate cream for lunch. Had back to back meetings and reviews with the customer visits and Board visits, only mode of having lunch was a can of diet coke, a few chocolates and friendly doorside Chatwala. Liked the Rocher a bit, tasted the same for the first time a week earlier when my Bro bought along an entire array of chocolates. Interestingly I've be introduced to the brand of chocolates on the day of my birthday where I was to gift the same to my colleagues. I never knew brand beyond a Cadbury dairy milk, or perk or a five star. Limited knowledge, but walk down a hyper-market and look down the various options and quick reference from a Chocoholic things are different. Chocolate selection is an art in itself, never mastered it though but understood that its high an art as tasting wine, and gifting chocolates is supposed to highest form of expression of love for youth, for an adult probably a diamond would suffice. So one interesting lesson learned is way of breaking into your loved ones heart small or big is through a chocolate. Well never a day is one late to offer one and accept one.
Now for some gyan I gathered - Chocolate it seems causes certain endocrine glands to secrete hormones that affect your feelings and behavior by making you happy. Therefore, it counteracts depression, in turn reducing the stress of depression. Your stress-free life helps you maintain a youthful disposition, both physically and mentally. So, eating lots of chocolates makes one happy--- hmm interesting, but I still doubt why children keep crying before having one and after having one, only logical answer is that it increases the craving for more of everything. Well no one can stop at one.
Scientific Answer
Chocolate expecially the dark kind is an excellent source of flavonoids epicatechin and gallic acid, which are thought to possess cardioprotective properties. In small portions it can actually be beneficial, and most obesity is caused by other foods high in calories in fat, most comonly fast foods that contain trans fats.
Chemical-Chemicals- and more Chemicals..
Happy Harmones - Serotonin, Endorphins, Dopamine, Progesterone (women)
Chemicals - Theobromine, Phenylethylamine (Love chemical), Anandaminde, Magnesium (leading to females craving for Chocolate)
To begin with, Chocolate contains over 300 chemicals and it is not known how all of these affect humans. Chocolate provides a feeling of well being. Serotonin and endorphins are the main reasons for the pleasing feeling. Serotoning is often found in the cnted of exercise, and have obtained its creadet as the “happy hormone” in chocolate. Serotonin is released after the consumption of carbohydreates. Its neurotransitters help send the message of a feeling of calmness and relaxation. In fact, Serotonin is usually given to deppressed patients to help them treat out of depression and generates feelings of live and ecstacy.
Endorphins are another chemical the brings a feeling of euphoria to the brain. Endorphins have also been proven to be an effective painkiller with same effects as morphine. Endorphins block the ‘mesage’ of pain that would be sent to the brain to be translated into pain.
In addition to serotonin and endorphing, chocolate also contains another mood elevating chemical called Theobromine, which is a chemical stimulant that is usually mistaken for caffine due to similar brain activity. When chocolate is consumed, Theobromine, from cocoa, and serotine, from carbohydrates, bind to each other and become a temporary antidepressant. This kind of binding relaeses message from the brain indicating a happy, elevated mood that causes depressed individuals to grab pounds and pounds of chocolate after a rough time.
Contrary to belief, chocolate only contains small amounts of caffine. But eventhough caffine is not present in enough quantaties as in coffee it does contain the same effects but in a lesser concentration.
Another depression reliever found in chocolate is Phenylethylamine or “The love chemical.” Phenylethylamine causes changes in blood pressure and sugar levels in the blood leading to feelings of exitement and alertness. It increases positive moods and decreased depression. Phenylethylamine also causes an increase in the pulse rate which results in a similar feeling when one is in love.
Another physiological chemical in chocolate is anandamide. Anandaminde resmbles THC, a chemical that is also found in marijuna. It activates the same receptors as does THC which causes a greater production of dopamine, a neurotransmitter that creates a feeling of well being associated with a high. Even though Anandaminde is already found in the brain and is broken rapidly, chocolate consumption adds to the amount that acctually gets broken down which casuses the effects of calmness and elevation. But it must be made clear that chocolate is not a drug and it would take very large amount of chocolate to create a high.
Many women report particular chocolate cravings when pre-menstrual. This is possibly because chocolate contains magnesium, a shortage of which can exacerbate pre-menstrual tension. Similar cravings during pregnancy could indicate mild anaemia, which chocolate's iron content may help to cure
May be a bold statement to make after experienced the Power-puff girl's chocolate power Man cannot live on chocolate alone; but woman sure can. Woman are atleast headstrong to focus regather and get along. Men I still doubt, legend talks about a Devadas, not a Devadaasi....

It is because of all these reasons that chocolate is the main component grabbed after a break-up or a seperation. It is a comfort food that elevates the mind and creats happines during chearless situations.
Until next blog chao

I am a White Chocolate Personality


You are White Chocolate
You are sweet, caring, and truly very innocent.
Whether your naive ways are a bit of act or not, people like to take care of you.
You are a quiet flirt, and your power is often underestimated!

Monday, November 26, 2007

Craziness is my current phase of life

Lots of uncertainty, after the sudden twist of events. Can't decide on lots of things, lots of turmoil, lots of pains, lack of overall vision and focus thats how I feel.
Its been over a month that things fell apart and probably over 31 days that I spoke to Shruti. Lots of people said a lot of things against the very person whom I adored and accepted inspite of the obvious shortcomings pointed out and till date couldn't really come out of this unfateful event. Time is a good healer people say, but its doing no good in my scenario for now.
Though I forcibly get to content myself saying that its like a "Casandra Phenomenon" or a "Deja Vu" or this ought to happen as a punishment of my Sins towards all the bad things which went between me and my family especially my mom, and my turning down of relation owing to the family pressure.
Learning and experiencing has been hard, lots of things have given up since then.
My Mobile broke loose, as if it had a heart, and was prime Witness to my relation. It felt and experienced the same way as I did, and unfortunately the same mobile which is less than 6 months old simply broke as I opened it.
No Diwali at home this year, unusual for I never missed Diwali in my entire life. Even my parents didn't burst a single crackers. If it was not for Vandana I wouldn't have joined the rest of the fraternity on Diwali. It was a painful feel, but I wanted to expereince it too.
My Gym and my grooming sessions all wound up abruptly owing to multiple reasons.
Had a cut on my forearm, which I left untreated lead to boil and Puss formation in the whole arm, and had to get it operated after 2 1/2 weeks of agony. Am still recovering from it. I've been bleeding for last 2 days, its pains double more due to Hyderbadii weather. The size of the depression is as big as to accommodate at least one medium sized playing ball marble. Put all the pain killers on the hold, though been advised Diclofenac Sodium thrice a day.
Had been off from office for last 6 days and entire first & second week of November. Feel very embarrassed to face the very people whom I shared my happiness.
My dream of moving into my own house fell apart, dream shattered, and torn apart.
All the 3500+ minutes of talk we had for endless night all ended abruptly without even a hush, and call informing of the next steps.
I know I am very sorry of being rude on occasions, but I couldn't be soft otherwise and ignore be tossed around and blamed and labelled as a Liar by a person who hardly understood how to assess people and values. The very girl I accepted against all odds braving against the worst of situation just showed me her back. I completely felt like a looser, for the respect and courtesy which I showed was never returned back. The respect of a relation, and treating her a person who is pure from mind, body and soul wasn't ever appreciated. May be I expecting a lot, but till this moment I feel I put efforts enough only to be ignored and treated as an untouchable. If she feels shez better without me, I thought so be it. Had she given me a chance to plead guilty and I would have closed it without a pain; never ever thats come.
Having seen all this I feel and probably say it to all that she stands to loose a lot by loosing me than I loosing her; for I swear I would have stood by wind and fire by day and the night by the side of the person whom I wanted to be with. She might not even realise it but I would only hope that at least a few years from now, if things were to go bad if she were to remember me I would be really be blessed.
Finding her I would have been the luckiest person, but loosing her I would say is her bad luck. If my gut feel and my sixth sense are correct if shez headed for rough weather, she would have been better off with some one supportive and who accepts her as-is. She would definitely need a hand to hold hers and take her along.
Yes, life is bed of roses, so sweet and aromatic and beautiful to look-at but underneath are always thorns which hurt, and life is always getting along with those thorns.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Learnings: Letting go....


Every now and then right through your childhood one is taught to keep trying and to never give, for ultimately one succeeds in ones goals.
Offlate I've kindaa discovered the other side of the statement. With the sequence of events which unfolded over the last three weeks and the kind of talk that got generated as an aftermath, and feelings of my near and dear, and how badly hurt are my parents and frightened of the consequence I am learning to live with a different notion.
Today I was watching a series on Vastu talking about removing clutter from home which would make life much easier to live. It talks about letting go of useless things of past which will allow new things to come-in with new flow of energy.
As an example of the same just caught up my mind while climbing the stairs back home. When we tighten the fists we feel strong and high in emotion, we can use our fists either to hit someone or hit ourself, but nothing more. Just a strong emotion, but by letting the fists loose, one is really could feel the blood flowing and the fists more relaxed and the person in turn more calmer. The hands are ready to do more than just hit out. Its unlocking of our own energy to achieve more.
In the same way, I guess I need to adopt the same principle, I've been holding out to my emotions and feelings for long, well beyond any tolerance limits. But for what, neither the families nor the person respond back. What is the use of clinging on, am getting stale and becoming a vegetable only to be sympathised. I trust my feelings and what my heart beats for, but I need to realise one basic thing " I should not prioritise people for whom I am just an option". Letting go is very hard. but once that is achieved one would feel relieved of all emotional passiveness and agony, and in turn regulate the same towards much more meaningful things in life. One needs to worry if something is wantedly been done wrongly, but need not worry about perception if the perspective of people are very narrow.
Anyways tonite I feel high, and I see my goals that are to be achieved, there is lot to be desired, dreamed and lived for. Am not the one who is running away from learning things, but am taking a step or two back so that I can run and leap ahead of everyones expectations to show what can be done. I wish I could prove what they have missed and what I have gained from the current situation. I can only hope thats all.....

Monday, November 12, 2007

Full Circle - Happy Days

I want to make this series the part of my Autobiography, but I really don't know wether these small incidents spread accross a period of 3 months to 1 year make any difference in my life in a long run. I still got atleast 40 years to look forward, only thing I can do when I look back 40 years from now is probably smile.
At this moment the time is 12.40 when I started drafting this in the blog. Its after a gap of probably 3 months am back blogging. Before blogging I've checked my vital stats for my blog, to see if some one is even visiting and reading the pages. Sadly the answer is no. Talking of full circle, I've started blogging inspired by my fellow classmates at IIM like the likes of Baba and Girl with Big Eyes; Nitai & Priya. The first blog I probably read was of Nitai 'Baba' on the SCon election politics. Quite entraled by his literary intellect. Than was hit by the wittyness of the Malu girl Priya. The controversy at the campus and the row which followed on the blog comments on Lionel Araha and Nanda Kumar, made me enter this blogging sphere.
Anyways today I've been using the blog to siphone out some bit of frustration and anxiety levels which I want to share and seek advice. I always feel pity at myself when I am very commandingly able to guide, help and solve issues of others who seek to approach me and whom I strongly feel bonded to, but when it comes to personal things I feel all but alone in this entire world. I feel that no one has time or patience to hear my word and if listened there is no way one gives a shoulder and pats and makes me undertand in a different perspective. I really felt that badly today while talking to Vimal a afriend of Ram Ogety. Vimal had his balance of isssues on career and thought of giving my two peneece. Just thought of myself and need of help personally and professionally at this crucial juncture. I feel terribly left out, dreams of mine on verge of shattering. Dreams might not big to break my heart, but small ones like settling down in the house of my own where I move in with my life partner and spend countless periods of time sharing happiness, and I want to be on top of the world by making her happy and see myself happy in my small world, where there is no scope for materialistic wants.

On 25th of Oct 2007, my new house was auspicously made open with Vastu Pooja being culminated after a week long Dusseraa celebration where I got my Chandi Homam completed and got the protection for the family and both the houses too. Slept on 25th at my new house, knew I would hardly sleep but somehow manged till early hours with my parents. That night I felt it was like my longest night. One partly due to the fact that I had patched up with Shrus after some bit friction which went overboard the previous weekend and got to talk freely from 24th after I let loose my issues which got out of hand with Shrus. I 've always been optimistic on this front and always believed once at home she would automatically scale up.
Eitherways on 26th Maheshmama comes to Hyd and I am wildy excited about it. I get to lay my hands on my wedding cards. For these cards I almost created a stir, put in lots of efforts and invested lots of valuble time and thought process to uniquely design 'one of a kind' card. This culminated into one after good 4 weeks of efforts and discussions. I was almost waiting for the Saturday to go visit the temple and get Pooja done. Again the night before a small argument follows on Pooja of the cards at Mumbai (really no clue why it went that way - I had nothing to say). Went to Lakshmi Ganapathi temple had the Pooja done. The first cards, set of 6 went to Shruti to be distributed at her end, (Ramya, Vamshi, Divya, Ajay, Nilofer, Manisha, Spoorthi(??) ) Then Srilekha booked tickets for the first show of Happy Days at Devi.
Lots of work going on both on the preparation front and work at my house, shuffling accross these I did somehow managed to reach the cinema almost 45 minutes late. This is my first movie with Srilekha. It took me close to 10 years to go along with her. The movie was one epic piece of entertainment. I enjoyed the movie to the core. Especially Tyson 'Arjun' Vs Sravs character kindaa idealised him. The others were Chandu with Madhu and Rajesh with Appu Shankar with Sangeetha. Loved the movie becaouse of multiple reasons,
Its something where I've been to for 4 long years & cribbed for life.
This has brought forward the nostalgia within me which I shared while travelling everyday to college right from ragging to bus travels and 120/220 bus routes to Vasavi halts etc etc.
Went to the movie with no expectations at all, enjoyed it and most importantly I didn't try to predict or forsee whats comming next, that made the movie more fun to watch and enjoy. Music and songs where very catchy and currently Happy day songs replaced all my ring tunes and am listening to them atleast 6 times a day like my previous track Saalm-e-Ishq. New tune for me has arrived.
After the movie I hardly was done with the dinner I got a call that Srilekha's brother Srikar ha an accident and is in the hospital. Had to rush with Srilekha and her mother to the hospital. The family depended on me for the support. I had to be with them well past mifdnight, the accident was a headon between two two-wheelers on the necklace road. One Srikar's friend who was driving the bike had very critical injuries. I could not bear the site of his state. Very taken back and hit by the state. Added to it there were atleast 3 deaths I've seen in the emergency ward, people crying with sorrow. I was quite shaken and unable to recover till next day morning. I could not even take my fiance's calls one I had to switch off my mobile for want of running down my battery; two because I was not in any state to talk. I wouldn't know that this would be the last time she would call to me talk. Next day, on Sunday 11.30 am she promptly calls on my mobile as I just entered my home, after catching some time on the workouts to relieve off the stress. I've begged for sometime to recuperate and refresh so that I can talk back calmly. That was the last words from her, which sounded worried.
Then things went for a turn, over an argument where I lost my cool when I was accused of being a liar and misguiding my family. Couldn't take it and this was retaliated very very aggressively costing me my dearest dream. All I built in the last 3 months which were becoming a reality is lost.
Today 11th of Nov 2007 after two weeks, a week off from office, we had a SatyaNarayana Vratam at my new house. My parents took care of all, with around 20 of the closest people attending I guess everyone made the merry out of the situation. After this went to meet Ram, played snooker, followed by a game of bowling (finished at 85) , candidly recollecting the Hiranandani expereince, and how everything is lost. I can't but feel like a looser today. Can't cry, cant let a tear down, for I can't break my parents heart as I cry for a girl for whom hasn't done anything to deelivate the situation. I've tried hard to find fault but still can't think in a negative, for I've started accepting and nearly adapting to her way of life and things which I presume are gaps. I don't know if she ever will think of me, but for me she will hold a special spot. Today with a heavy heart and void unfillable went to Happy days again for the second time with Aarti, Ram and Vimal. Had a good time and laughed and enjoyed. But all the time I still keep thinking of Shrus and the way she talks. Some correlation in terms of saying "Challa challa istam" , Ego clashes etc. Really feel that girls are hard to understand and I hope I could have understood Shrus far better and taken care of things which look like today. Really pains deep within, and really feel like forgetting every goal in my life I've set. But I still hope I get her back one day, if not that atleast I hope I get to plead pardon for hurting her and hopefuly she accept my appology, and put a stop to the bad blood which has tarnished both of us. I sincerely hope that the egos of everyone are gone, and instead of running away from the issue learn how to adopt and tame oneself to be a better person. I want to be the best lifeparnter and never would cut my efforts from not achieving the same...

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